Why We Chose to Adopt: An Open Letter to Caleb

Dear Caleb,
I know you are not able to read this or understand it right now, but I wanted to write it down now while all of the thoughts and feelings are still fresh in my mind.  I have made this an "open letter" so that other people can read it and hopefully get closer to understanding adoptive parents' perspective.
It was about one year ago that we met you for the first time.  It was a day like no other, and it was certainly a day that I will never forget.  When you were placed in our arms, our lives were changed forever and for the better, but that single day was a long time in the making.
Ever since I was young and first heard of the concept of adoption, it was always something that interested me.  As I grew as a follower of Christ, I learned of how adoption was a beautiful picture of the Gospel - how we were adopted by God to be his sons and daughters, to be Christ's brothers and sisters - not because of anything we had done or because of who we are but because of God's mercy and compassion and His plan of salvation through the work of Jesus.  When I first learned of this profound truth, I felt the calling to one day adopt children of my own.  When your dad and I met and were married, we agreed that adoption would certainly be in the future one day.
In my head, I always assumed that we would have one or two babies the natural way before we adopted.  I wanted to be that super cute family with two kids who are the spitting image of mom or dad and a couple of kids with darker skin who clearly came from a different part of the world or from a different gene pool.  But as the saying goes, the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry...Thankfully, God's plans never do.
When most people learn that we adopted, they usually assume that your dad and I have been unable to have children naturally.  They would be correct.  We struggled for three years with infertility - a painful, laborious three years full of uncertainty about the future and our next steps.  While I know people do not mean any harm when they make this assumption, it's part of the reason that we waited so long before pursuing adoption.  In my head, I didn't want you or others to think that we just chose to adopt because it was our last option, because you were our second choice.  I desperately wanted our adopted children to know how much they were loved and wanted.  So we kept deciding to wait to adopt, to see if the Lord would give us a child the natural way.  All the while, a still small voice in my heart kept asking, "Why don't you just begin the adoption process now?"
We finally came to a crossroads in January of 2013 where we had to decide if we wanted to pursue IVF.  The costs were high for such a procedure and success was not guaranteed.   The weight of infertility already weighed heavily on our shoulders; I feared what the additional weight of spending tens of thousands of dollars on a procedure that may not work would do.  And I still couldn't shake that small voice telling me to pursue adoption now. 
So we made the decision to take the money that we would have spent on IVF and begin the adoption process.  It was like we were finally free from this burden that we had been carrying around for months and years.  And it's funny how when we were finally in the Lord's will, things became so effortless and smooth.  (This is not to say that IVF is not the Lord's will for others - it just wasn't for us.)  We sailed through the home study process, and we presented our profile for the first time for a baby boy in July 2013.  That baby was you, and of course, we were the family selected for you. It all took about six months - from filling out the paper work to bringing you home - less time than a typical pregnancy.
So if you ever wonder why we adopted, know this:  we adopted because it was God's will that you be our child.  It was no small coincidence caused by our inability to conceive.  On the contrary, it was a huge miracle brought about by the hand of God himself, using seemingly tragic circumstances to bring about good.  Thousands - even millions - of details had to fall exactly into place so that you would end up in our family.   I now know there was a purpose for our infertility...so that we would meet you.  If I had to do it all over again, I wouldn't change a single thing about our story.
Love always,
Mom

You've Come A Long Way, Baby!

One year ago today, we found out that Caleb was going to be our baby, and we finally saw pictures of our boy.  Here was one of the first pictures we ever saw of him:

I loved him from the first instant that I saw this picture.  He was probably 4 lbs. when this one was taken.  Compare that to this picture from today:

He's over 25 lbs. today - most of which comes from his cheeks...
One year ago today, Caleb was in the hospital waiting for his family to come get him.

Now, he's got a mommy, a daddy, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends who absolutely adore him.  And he's probably the happiest baby I've ever known.

Back then, none of us knew what sort of health repercussions there would be as a result of him being born so early.

Now, by the grace of God, he's just as healthy as can be.

You've certainly come a long way, baby!

From October 2013