Why We Chose to Adopt: An Open Letter to Caleb

Dear Caleb,
I know you are not able to read this or understand it right now, but I wanted to write it down now while all of the thoughts and feelings are still fresh in my mind.  I have made this an "open letter" so that other people can read it and hopefully get closer to understanding adoptive parents' perspective.
It was about one year ago that we met you for the first time.  It was a day like no other, and it was certainly a day that I will never forget.  When you were placed in our arms, our lives were changed forever and for the better, but that single day was a long time in the making.
Ever since I was young and first heard of the concept of adoption, it was always something that interested me.  As I grew as a follower of Christ, I learned of how adoption was a beautiful picture of the Gospel - how we were adopted by God to be his sons and daughters, to be Christ's brothers and sisters - not because of anything we had done or because of who we are but because of God's mercy and compassion and His plan of salvation through the work of Jesus.  When I first learned of this profound truth, I felt the calling to one day adopt children of my own.  When your dad and I met and were married, we agreed that adoption would certainly be in the future one day.
In my head, I always assumed that we would have one or two babies the natural way before we adopted.  I wanted to be that super cute family with two kids who are the spitting image of mom or dad and a couple of kids with darker skin who clearly came from a different part of the world or from a different gene pool.  But as the saying goes, the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry...Thankfully, God's plans never do.
When most people learn that we adopted, they usually assume that your dad and I have been unable to have children naturally.  They would be correct.  We struggled for three years with infertility - a painful, laborious three years full of uncertainty about the future and our next steps.  While I know people do not mean any harm when they make this assumption, it's part of the reason that we waited so long before pursuing adoption.  In my head, I didn't want you or others to think that we just chose to adopt because it was our last option, because you were our second choice.  I desperately wanted our adopted children to know how much they were loved and wanted.  So we kept deciding to wait to adopt, to see if the Lord would give us a child the natural way.  All the while, a still small voice in my heart kept asking, "Why don't you just begin the adoption process now?"
We finally came to a crossroads in January of 2013 where we had to decide if we wanted to pursue IVF.  The costs were high for such a procedure and success was not guaranteed.   The weight of infertility already weighed heavily on our shoulders; I feared what the additional weight of spending tens of thousands of dollars on a procedure that may not work would do.  And I still couldn't shake that small voice telling me to pursue adoption now. 
So we made the decision to take the money that we would have spent on IVF and begin the adoption process.  It was like we were finally free from this burden that we had been carrying around for months and years.  And it's funny how when we were finally in the Lord's will, things became so effortless and smooth.  (This is not to say that IVF is not the Lord's will for others - it just wasn't for us.)  We sailed through the home study process, and we presented our profile for the first time for a baby boy in July 2013.  That baby was you, and of course, we were the family selected for you. It all took about six months - from filling out the paper work to bringing you home - less time than a typical pregnancy.
So if you ever wonder why we adopted, know this:  we adopted because it was God's will that you be our child.  It was no small coincidence caused by our inability to conceive.  On the contrary, it was a huge miracle brought about by the hand of God himself, using seemingly tragic circumstances to bring about good.  Thousands - even millions - of details had to fall exactly into place so that you would end up in our family.   I now know there was a purpose for our infertility...so that we would meet you.  If I had to do it all over again, I wouldn't change a single thing about our story.
Love always,
Mom

You've Come A Long Way, Baby!

One year ago today, we found out that Caleb was going to be our baby, and we finally saw pictures of our boy.  Here was one of the first pictures we ever saw of him:

I loved him from the first instant that I saw this picture.  He was probably 4 lbs. when this one was taken.  Compare that to this picture from today:

He's over 25 lbs. today - most of which comes from his cheeks...
One year ago today, Caleb was in the hospital waiting for his family to come get him.

Now, he's got a mommy, a daddy, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends who absolutely adore him.  And he's probably the happiest baby I've ever known.

Back then, none of us knew what sort of health repercussions there would be as a result of him being born so early.

Now, by the grace of God, he's just as healthy as can be.

You've certainly come a long way, baby!

From October 2013

Ladies' Man

Maybe it's the mysterious dark blue eyes.  Maybe it's his golden tan and chunky monkey legs.  Maybe it's his pearly whites (all 2 1/4 of them).  Or maybe it's the long dark eye lashes and chubby cheeks.  Maybe it's the way he squeals and claps when he's excited.  Whatever the cause, it's undeniable:  Caleb is a full-fledged ladies' man. 
From young to old, they all fall for his boyish charm.  Just this week, I picked him up from the kids club at the gym, where he was crying on the floor next to a little baby girl.  When I asked why he was crying, I was told that the little girl next to him just had to hold him the whole time.  He's apparently irresistible even to the littlest of ladies.  When I picked him up, he smiled and clapped, happy to be rescued from his admirer.
I'm just glad to see that he only has eyes for his mama (at least for now).

World's Most Awesome Dad

Caleb, I'm sure you already know this, but your daddy is Awesome. Not just awesome but capital "A" Awesome.  As in the very definition of World's Most Awesome Dad.  Just the other day, I came home to the two of you rocking out to Van Halen (I'm told you were even dancing!).  You can't help but squeal with delight when he turns your frowns upside down (literally) by dangling you by your feet in mid-air.  When you weren't feeling so well earlier this week, I found you asleep on his chest, just like you used to do when you were a bitty baby.  Despite the name, you love it when he puts you in "baby jail" (the laundry basket) and then turns it into a baby roller coaster by swinging you back and forth.  Even more important than all of that, he continually shows you what it means to be a man of God, a loving and devoted husband, a diligent worker, and a faithful servant to others.  He selflessly gives of his time and energy to work hard to provide for us and then spends his free time playing with you (even when all he may want and need is a nap!).  He's not only the model of what an earthly father should be, even with his faults and shortcomings, but he also never ceases pointing you to our perfect Heavenly Father.  So, on this his First Father's Day as a father, make sure to be extra sweet to him and let him know how much we both love and appreciate him and all of his Awesomeness.

Caleb at One Year

Weight:  24 lbs.
Height:  29 inches.
Teeth:  2.
He can:  pull up, "cruise", clap, wave, play peek-a-boo, and "high-five."
He loves:  things that spin (especially wheels), going outside, playing with the blinds, dancing, music, laughing with Mommy, and Checker (our cat).
Favorite food:  sweet potatoes, butternut squash, bananas, strawberries, and peas.
Favorite songs:  Rockin' Robin and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. 
He can say:  cat (well, it usually comes out more like "dat" or "gat" but we all know what he's saying!). 
Favorite book:  Jesus Storybook Bible and Goodnight Moon.

Yes, We're Crazy: Caleb's First Easter, New House and First Birthday

I know we've been MIA for a while...but for good cause.  One day in March, mostly out of curiosity (and certainly not because we had made the decision to buy a new house), we decided to look at a house that had just been listed in a neighborhood  near where we lived.  It had a basement and a large lot in a cul-de-sac, which were appealing qualities.  We thought, "where's the harm in just looking?"  Well, within in less than ten minutes of walking through the front door in this house, we decided to make an offer on it.  I introduce to you Exhibit A as to why we have gone crazy.  Yes, without even being entirely certain that we wanted to move anywhere, we made an offer to purchase a house (all while still owning another that was not even listed for sale).  To make the long story short, we bought a new (to us) house at the beginning of May. In defense of our decision, this house has lots of unique characteristics, large rooms, and a to-die-for backyard that backs up to federal land surrounding Lake Allatoona.  The instant I stepped foot in the backyard, I began daydreaming of beautiful flowers, tree houses, play sets, and games of catch - it would be the perfect back yard for a little boy to grow up in (and that his gardener mama could love, too).
So April was consumed with packing and planning...with an eleven month old.  Which leads me to Exhibit B as to our insanity.  Moving an entire household in a month is a daunting enough task, but throw in a baby to the mix and we're talking the very definition of crazy.  There were many occasions during the month of April in which I questioned our decision.  But now that the boxes are all unpacked and the pictures are all hung, I'm so happy that we made the decision that we did.
And truthfully, Caleb took it all in stride and was such a good baby while we were frantically packing and unpacking.  Here are a few pictures that we snapped during the chaos:
Easter at Pepaw's House

"Helping" Mommy pack:

My view of Caleb while we shopped for things for the new house:

"Helping" Daddy paint (with headphones, of course):

Making a mess at snack time, as usual:

While we were moving, Caleb stayed with my parents and Tony's parents for a few nights each.  From what it sounds like, he thoroughly enjoyed himself at both places.  When he came back home (or soon thereafter), he was crawling, pulling up, cruising, and he soon started "talking" up a storm.  I attribute all of these powers to the two new teeth that all of a sudden popped out:

And as my final piece of evidence that we've lost every last one of our marbles, I present to you the fact that only three short weeks after moving into our new house, we threw a big party to celebrate the completion of Caleb's rookie year (his first birthday).  It was great motivation to get it all done - we were hammering, drilling, organizing, and cleaning from the moment Caleb went to sleep every night until we passed out from exhaustion.  (As a side note, I am still amazed that he could sleep through all of that.)  Miraculously, when his birthday rolled around, the house was in (mostly) presentable shape.  All of our family and close friends came to celebrate (and check out the new house).  Here are a few highlights from the big day:

In conclusion, I believe that that the evidence speaks for itself:  we're certifiably crazy.  But at least we now have a  nice serenity garden to nurse us back to sanity.

Helmet-Free and Lovin' Life

This past Tuesday we were given the all clear to remove the big blue helmet from our baby's noggin once and for all.  It was not very cuddly, it sure did hurt when it was banged up against my chin, and the smell was quite repulsive...But it did its job:
Before the helmet, there was a definite flat spot and uneven growth.

 Now, his head is as round as the blueberries he likes to eat for breakfast!

Anyone in the market for a used helmet?